


laktatsiya

by jaerie



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: ALL THE NIPPLES, Body Worship, Breastfeeding, F/F, Girl Direction, Harry is proud of his tits, Hormones, Induced Lactation, Lactation Kink, Milking, Nipple Licking, Nipples, Pregnancy, Pregnant Louis, Pregnant Sex, References to Body Dysmorphia, References to Depression, Trans Character, Vaginal Fingering, as he should be, muffing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-05
Updated: 2020-03-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:33:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23023297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaerie/pseuds/jaerie
Summary: Harry and Lou are well on their way to starting a family.  It was an up hill battle, but Lou's belly is growing and the baby will be here before they know it.  It's just that Harry is a little jealous that she isn't the one carrying their child.  She finds a way to be just as involved, if everything works out according to their plan, anyway.
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson
Comments: 9
Kudos: 160





	laktatsiya

**Author's Note:**

> this isn't mean to be nor should be taken as anything other than the journey of these two specific characters. they have their own personal thoughts and feelings and should not be taken as a blanketed depiction of every trans person or relationship. we are all unique! as are these characters. this is their story. 
> 
> this is gifted to whoever sent this prompt in a several months ago! i hope this is along the lines of what you were looking for.

Harry stared at Lou getting dressed for work from her position on the bed. It was the first time she’d been able to see the little curve of Lou’s belly without looking for it. It felt like the baby hadn’t existed in their real life before that exact moment when Harry had managed to forget for a second until it was just right there. It all suddenly felt so real. 

She watched her drop the towel wrapped around her body and go about her routine like she was the only one in the room. She probably assumed Harry was still asleep. Still, Harry didn’t look away until every piece of Lou’s outfit was in place except for her socks. For those she came and sat down on the edge of the bed. 

It was cop out, but Harry closed her eyes and pretended she was asleep. She needed a moment to herself to work through why she suddenly felt so weird about it. Less than twelve hours ago, she’d been on this very bed kissing that very same bump and sending nothing but good vibes to their unborn child. And nothing had really changed, had it? 

She popped an eye open only after she heard the gentle click of their bedroom door, immediately flopping onto her back and staring at the ceiling. 

She wanted a baby. They  _ both _ wanted a baby. The pregnancy wasn’t an accident or a surprise. This was months of preparation and planning followed by months of trying. Harry had absolutely no regrets about any of it. So why was there an odd emotion swirling in the pit of her stomach?

She pulled in a small gasp when she finally identified what it was. Envy. She was envious of Lou’s belly. 

Harry had always wanted to have children. She remembered crying in grade school when the teacher told her that boys didn’t have the parts to have a baby. There had been many bouts of depression throughout her transition and a contributing factor was that she would never have the ability to carry a child. She thought she’d come to terms with that before they even started this process. 

Turned out she hadn’t. 

She placed her hands on her own flat stomach and pouted. It wasn’t fair that she would never have the experience of feeling a baby growing inside her. She would have jumped at the chance if she could. 

Harry hated stereotypes and gender roles, but she also couldn’t deny what was true. Lou was the butch in their relationship and proud of it. She kept her hair cropped into short styles and Harry only remembered her ever donning a dress once and that had been for a lost bet. She didn’t wear makeup and preferred sporty clothes whenever she could get away with it. Harry loved her for it. 

And that wasn’t just one way. Lou loved Harry and her obsession with vintage dresses and hairstyles with big curls, her collection of bright red lipsticks and mascara that made her lashes even longer than they were naturally. They complemented each other and if they happened to fall into some stereotypes, Harry had to accept that. She just hated the labels. 

Still, there would be no question about which one of them would carry their children if there wasn’t just that one small, tiny detail standing in their way. No matter what hormone therapies or surgeries were available to Harry, there wasn’t yet a way for her to grow a uterus. 

As much as Lou loved and wanted children, it had taken some time for her to finally agree to be their carrier. In the end, it was really the only feasible way for them to have children. They would never have enough money for a surrogate and even adoption was well out of their price range. Especially if they wanted to stay in the house they loved in their little neighborhood. 

So they had done it the old fashioned way -- kind of. 

Harry found all of Lou’s whining and complaining adorable at first and now Harry found it hard not to snap. If given the chance, Harry would  _ never _ complain about being pregnant. It grew irritating that Lou didn’t even want to do it yet was easily carrying around their child. Harry would take over in a heartbeat and wouldn’t be taking it for granted.

“Would you stop moping around the house?” Lou finally smacked her upside the head in the playful lovetap way she always did when she thought Harry was being a brat. Harry frowned and glared at her which only enhanced her pout. It had been a few weeks and Harry knew she was being moody. She also knew Lou didn’t deserve it. 

“I get it. Believe me, both of us would rather this be you,” she pointed to her stomach, “So can you stop? I’d gladly hand over this whole experience if I could, but I can’t. It would be a lot easier for both of us if you could stop with the attitude.” 

Harry sighed and slouched where she sat, her arms crossed over her chest. She knew Lou was right. It would be the same way if she had been born with female parts and naturally wasn’t able to carry for some reason. They’d talked about this. They’d exhausted the subject. Lou knew all of the things Harry longed for and Harry knew all of the things Lou wasn’t looking forward to. After all of that, the decision for Lou to carry their baby was mutual. 

But Harry was stubborn and it was hard for her to admit she’d let her jealousy steer her thoughts. She looked over and sighed as she forced all of it to drain from her body. Her anger wasn’t at Lou and it wasn’t fair to ruin the pregnancy when it should have been a happy and exciting time for them. 

“I’m sorry. I just see your belly and get so jealous that it’s not mine.” 

“I’m hypothetically jealous that you’d probably have the perfect pregnancy with no morning sickness or anything. You’d probably wake up glowing every single morning instead of waking up a sweaty mess.”

Harry smirked because that was exactly how she always imagined it in her head, even after seeing the reality of Lou’s rough first trimester. 

“You’re probably right,” she nodded and Lou threw a pillow at her head. “I just want to bond with the baby on that level, you know? We made them and I just want to be a part of that.” 

“You could always breastfeed,” Lou shrugged. 

Harry frowned. “Not funny.” 

It wasn’t like Lou to throw that kind of comment at her. She knew what some of her depression triggers were tied to. 

“I’m serious. You know I’m not looking forward to that part and it might really be helpful.”

“You know I can’t,” Harry said softly. She had to look away as just the thought had her mourning the loss of something she could never have all over again. 

“Why not? You have the parts for it.  _ Very _ nice parts, might I add.” 

Harry blushed and grabbed her boobs with a grin. They really had developed nicely and she was only maybe a _ little _ proud of them. Or a lot proud of them. They weren’t huge, but were natural and fit her frame nicely. She’d been so relieved when her body started to catch up with her mind and she didn’t have to consider breast implants. The thought of surgery in general made her knees feel weak. Needles still made her feel queasy even after the countless hormone shots and blood work she’d gone through in her life. 

“I saw an article about adoptive mothers doing it so they could breastfeed their adopted babies. It takes some effort, but if they adjust your hormones, I don’t think it would be that difficult. You could ask your doctor about it. When’s your next appointment?” 

“I have to go in for bloodwork in a couple weeks, I think.”

“See what they say about it. It doesn’t hurt to ask. They’ve already been monitoring your hormone levels so it would probably be easy for them to know exactly what to change. The article said stuff about the hormones in birth control prep breast tissue or something and other medications and stuff?” 

Harry thought about it while she held her breasts in her hands and imagined what it might feel like to be heavy and full of milk. If she couldn’t birth a baby, being able to help nursing theirs would be an incredible replacement experience, especially since Harry would be the one staying home with the baby once they were born. 

It wasn’t a decision that required much thought after that and Harry found herself squeezing her eyes shut as she received her first prolactin stimulating shot at her next appointment. It was still months until they would welcome their baby into the world, but Harry had a lot of work ahead of her. 

She stopped off at the pharmacy for her new prescriptions and called Lou as she wandered up and down the aisles and stopped in front of the breast pumps.

She started talking as soon as she heard the call connect. 

“Should I buy a breast pump right now or do you think we can afford to wait a few days to order something from Amazon? She said it could take a few months for my milk to come in, but if I start using a breast pump now a few times a day, it will increase my chances. What do you think?” 

“So she thinks it’s possible?” 

Harry could hear Lou shuffling around and wondered if maybe she should have texted first. 

“Yeah and she already gave me the first round of some kind of something. I wrote it all down. I don’t think our insurance is going to cover it, but the first shot was only $35 so I figured that was okay. I have a couple pills I have to take too. I’m at the pharmacy right now.” 

“Oh wow, that’s great! I didn’t think it would go that fast.” 

“It’s like you said, she’s been my doctor monitoring everything for so long that it must have been easy for her to figure out what to give me I guess. She’s been really happy for us since we finally got pregnant. But what do you think? Should I buy one now or wait?” 

She squatted in the aisle to look at the options lined up in boxes along the bottom shelf with anti-theft devices on them. 

“You might as well. Insurance won’t pay for a rental until after the baby is born and everything I’ve been reading says you’re already behind in the game.” 

Harry took her time selecting one that had a number of features and groaned at the price. It wasn’t even the most expensive one on the shelf. She sighed and picked it up anyway. Having a baby wasn’t cheap and she’d already been setting aside the money she normally spent on clothes and cosmetics. Lord knows she already had enough lipstick to last a lifetime. 

-

Harry woke up when the bed shifted and then startled when a pillow whomped down over her face. 

“What was that for?” she grumbled as she pushed the pillow away. 

“It’s not fair you get to take naps when I need them more.” 

Lou groaned as she stretched out on the bed and put her feet up on the pile of blankets she’d arranged. 

“I don’t normally,” Harry rolled over onto her side and pushed Lou’s shirt up to kiss her belly. “I was just feeling all dizzy and nauseated from those shots. They apparently have a lot of potential side effects and you know I’m a magnet for side effects.” 

“Or the universe just decided it wasn’t fair for you to get off easy and finally started to dish out some pregnancy symptoms.” 

Harry smiled against the stretched skin of Lou’s belly. She loved how testy Lou could get sometimes. They’d bickered a lot at the start of their relationship until Harry figured out it was her way of getting things out of her system. It passed quickly if she just accepted it and now she found it endearing. 

“You know how much I love you for doing this,” Harry said softly as she pressed kissed over her belly. She slid her hand under Lou’s shirt and her lips followed, slipping one of Lou’s breasts from her sports bra. 

“That doesn’t have the same effect that it used to,” Lou said with a glare that didn’t hold much fire as Harry closed in on her nipple. “I hate you for doing this to me right now.” 

“No you don’t,” Harry murmured against her soft skin, “You loved every minute of it.” 

Lou gasped when Harry finally closed her lips around her nipple and circled the tip of her tongue around it. 

She nipped it with her teeth just enough to pinch and smirked. “Admit it.” 

“Fuck,” Lou cursed out and looked torn between pulling Harry closer and pushing her away. “Okay fine, I did.” 

Harry grinned and went back to soft and gentle attention, delighting in the way it made her squirm. 

“Yeah you did,” Harry slid her hand over Lou’s belly in sensual strokes. It was just taking on a perfect curve, one that was becoming difficult to hide beneath anything other than oversized clothing. “You’re so sexy like this, with our baby.” 

“Yeah, glad they’re ours,” Lou moaned. One of her hands joined Harry’s below her belly button where their baby was growing and she linked their fingers together. 

They were locked in a heated kiss a moment later, messy with tongues and saliva and smudged lipstick. 

“Touch me,” Lou begged while directing their hands south, tugging Harry’s hand with urgency. They disappeared easily into the soft leggings she must have changed into after work, soft cotton damp against their knuckles as Harry’s fingertip teased her shaved skin, soft prickles from a few days of growth. 

Lou moaned as she urged Harry on, impatient as ever as she parted her thighs and practically forced Harry to abort her teasing which was one of Harry’s favourite things to do. 

At least she was rewarded with a loud guttural moan when her finger ventured further and teased her clit with a gentle circle. 

“Yeah baby,” Lou breathed and pulled their lips back together by the fist she had in Harry’s hair. “Been thinking about you with that breast pump all day. You’re going to be such a MILF, so fucking hot feeding our baby.” 

Harry bucked into Lou’s hip, moaning as the words sparked images in her head. She wanted that so badly. She wanted to bond with their new baby, to be able to nourish them from her own body. She wanted Lou to find her attractive, wanted them to share that. She wanted to taste Lou’s milk and have Lou taste hers. She wanted to rub their milky nipples together and-- 

Harry moaned and focused her fingertip on Lou’s clit just under the hood to give her a quick jolt of what Harry was feeling. Breast milk had never seemed so arousing, but once the seed was planted, it started to dig its roots in immediately. 

She dipped her fingers down into Lou’s cunt to pull out her thick slick, spreading it out for her two middle fingers to easily slide as they straddled Lou’s button. 

“Yeah, just like that,” Lou panted and arched into Harry’s hand. 

Harry wasn’t going to voice her milky thoughts now, not sure if it was something that was normal to be turned on by. Instead, she kept it to herself and shifted so her lower half was pressed into the mattress. She could still easily keep her fingers on Lou and freed her other arm enough to get a hand under herself. 

She wiggled around until she found the right angle, moaning against Lou’s belly as she started to finger herself at the same speed. She liked it better with lube but was too worked up to stop for it, finding friction with her thumb on the head of her clit while her fingers disappeared in bunched up sensitive skin.

She could actually feel when Lou came, letting it run through her own body as she brought herself to her own peak. 

A lazy grin and a few more slow strokes had all but dissolved Lou’s complaints. Harry loved the two of them together so much. She never thought she’d ever find someone who fit her as perfectly and sex was just the bonus afterthought to add to what they already were. 

“So. Did you end up buying a pump?” Lou asked as she slid her fingers through Harry’s hair affectionately. She smirked when Harry nodded. “Then let’s get those tits out and get to work! Your boobs were practically made for this!” 

“No, I made them so I could show them off,” Harry grinned. 

“Oh my god, you’re so full of yourself! Get off me!” 

Harry giggled as Lou pushed her away, Lou shrieking when Harry then tried to wipe her wet hand on Lou’s face. It was only Lou’s laughing pleas for the baby that they didn’t end up in a full blown wrestling match right there on top of the covers. 

“But seriously, go get it and try it out,” Lou said once their laughter had calmed. 

Harry climbed off the bed and returned with the box she hadn’t even opened yet. She climbed back up and sat cross legged on the bed, opened the top and pulled out the instructions. 

“This says to sterilize everything first,” Harry wrinkled her nose. 

Lou waved her hand in dismissal as she lounged back with her fingers intertwined over her belly. “You’re not using it for actual milk yet, I’m sure it’s fine.”

She kept reading and then started to unpack everything piece by piece. 

“So this is basically an elaborate puzzle to put together,” she said as she held up a handful of plastic pieces helplessly. 

Lou laughed as Harry fumbled to fit everything together, cheering when it finally all snapped together and looked somewhat close to what the instructions had pictured. Nearly falling off the bed, she leaned over to plug it into the powerstrip their phone cords were plugged into. 

Her shirt and bra came off easily and she sat in front of Lou and experimentally pressed the cups to her breasts. Her nipples were small, but her puffy areolas were the perfect size for the hole at the peak of the cone. 

“I guess push that button?” Harry wrinkled her nose and chewed on her cherry red-stained lip as she waited for something to happen. 

It was weird at first, the suction pulling at her nipples in a somewhat pleasurable way while she held the cups with her hands. She watched as her nipples were pulled through the little hole into the plastic tube and shrugged. 

“It’s not so bad. Kind of like you sucking on them without the tongue action.” 

“You’re so weird,” Lou shook her head and then pressed the button to up the suction with a smirk. 

“Lou! Hey!” Harry protested and winced when that setting almost immediately made her nipples feel uncomfortably sore. She pulled the cups away with a frown. 

“You can’t just stop,” Lou laughed and turned the settings back down again. 

“It kind of hurt,” she pouted and slouched where she sat. 

“You think our baby is going to go easy on you just because it  _ “kind of hurts” _ ? If you’re going to do this, you have to commit.” 

“What do you know about it,” Harry muttered petulantly. 

“A lot. Too much. Which is why I’m not looking forward to it,” Lou frowned, “I started reading breastfeeding horror stories by accident when mine were really really sore at first and I’d be happy to never do it.” 

“So you tried to convince me to do it instead,” Harry deadpanned and let the pumps fall into her lap. 

Lou rolled her eyes. “Yes and no. Yeah, it’s not the most comfortable thing to do. Neither is actually being pregnant – which I also didn’t want to do by the way – but we both wanted a baby and so all the shit my body is going through will be worth it. At the same time, if I don’t have to deal with the breastfeeding side of things too… But Harry,” Lou’s tone grew serious and she sat up, her fingertips touching Harry’s jaw gently, “I know you wanted this and I know that you’ll be really upset and disappointed with yourself once they’re here if you had a chance to do this and you stopped because it was uncomfortable.”

Harry sighed and nodded and knew she was just nervous. The sensation made it suddenly so real and her emotions felt scrambled. It wasn’t even that bad, more uncomfortable and foreign than anything. 

“I know,” she admitted softly and leaned in to kiss her wife. “You’re right.” 

She held the cups up against her breasts again and then nodded for Lou to turn it back on. It was weird, but she held out until the timer Lou had set finally went off for the first time of what would be many. 

-

“Harry.” 

Lou kicked Harry’s thigh from the other end of the couch to get her attention, pulling her away from her open book. 

“Yeah?” she responded absently, peering over her glasses as she looked over. Her hand was resting lightly on Lou’s ankle where it had been for a while, both of them very tactile in even the simplest ways. She squeezed her fingers, gently rubbing the foot that hadn’t kicked her. 

Lou lifted her other foot and bumped the breast pump held to Harry’s chest by the special band with her toe. “You almost done with that?” 

“I can be,” she shrugged and tucked the bookmark into the spine between the pages, “Why?” 

“Because I’ve been watching your nipples for at least an hour and I’m getting jealous.” 

Harry caught a hint of motion and shifted her focus down to where Lou’s arm disappeared into her leggings. She pulled her glasses off with a smirk. 

“And you expect me to just drop everything?” She raised a brow in question. 

“Obviously.”

Harry laughed and unzipped the front of the bra holding the cups in place. It wasn’t a particularly attractive piece of clothing, but it was practical and useful and meant she didn’t have to hold the things to her chest the whole time. She turned the pump off and pulled them away from her breasts. Her nipples were puffy and dark pink from the suction and stuck out proudly. They were always a bit sore lately, but she found she liked the sensitivity. It helped her to remember to keep her routine consistent. 

It took a second for Lou to push herself up now that the curve of her belly had grown enough to be in her way. She pulled her own shirt off over her head before taking the book and glasses out of Harry’s hands to set them next to the lamp. She straddled Harry’s thighs and bit her bottom lip. 

“Fucking hell,” Lou mumbled in awe as she cupped Harry’s breast and slid her thumbs over her nipples. Harry sucked in a gasp at the soft and gentle attention. It had always amazed her that she could be so affected just by Lou admiring her body. She preened under the attention. 

Lou pushed the thin silky robe off Harry’s shoulders and then took Harry’s right nipple into her mouth against her tongue. That always just did things to Harry and she let her head fall back with a whimper while she melted into the couch. Lou’s hair was soft and unstyled when her fingers slid into it to encourage what she was doing. 

“Watching that thing pull on your nipples was driving me crazy,” Lou mumbled against her breast before circling her tongue and diving back in. Harry arched her chest towards her mouth. 

“Are you still going to like them as much when they’re filled with milk?” Harry’s breathy voice asked.

“More,” Lou nuzzled her nose against the soft curve and started to drag kisses across her chest to her other nipple. “It seems like something that’s going to suit you, like you were made for it.” 

Harry flushed as her blood rushed in her veins with that comment. It made it feel bigger than herself, bigger than a selfish want. She wanted it because she felt like it was the way it was supposed to be. It was what her body was supposed to do. It was a rush because Lou wanted it maybe even more than she did. 

“Maybe you should do the work of that pump then,” Harry moaned when Lou sucked hard on her sensitive nipple. It was a flash of pain she wanted to hold onto, that she wanted more of. 

“Wish I could,” Lou mumbled as she shifted to straddle one of Harry’s thighs, grinding down against it so Harry could feel the heat between her legs through their clothes. 

“Is this the horny part of pregnancy?” Harry grinned and should have expected when Lou playfully smacked her. 

“Don’t ruin it,” Lou scolded her but they both knew she was just joking. It didn’t wipe the smirk from Harry’s face. 

Harry followed the curve of Lou’s belly with her palm, her fingers spread out against her skin. She followed them to Lou’s hip that was moving to find friction against Harry’s thigh, before slipping them under the elastic waist of her leggings. Her fingers touched where she was wet and Harry wondered just how long she’d been touching herself before demanding Harry’s attention. It had been quite an interesting book and Harry had been consumed by it. She hadn’t noticed. 

“Couldn’t finish yourself off?” Harry asked as she teased with slow strokes before slipping a finger inside. 

“Your fingers are so much better,” Lou moaned which made Harry beam. She always loved when Lou stroked her ego. 

But even if it was Harry’s fingers that she loved, Lou also loved being in control. She rode Harry’s fingers while grinding against her palm, gasping as she sought her pleasure. 

She didn’t leave Harry in the dust, though. Her mouth nipped and then soothed Harry’s nipples, taking advantage of their sensitivity. Harry thought she might be able to come just from that and then actually did when Lou provided the perfect amount of pressure with her knee between Harry’s legs. Sometimes she was just too easy. 

She pulled Lou’s mouth up and away from her nipples for a sloppy kiss, urging her on as Harry’s hand began to cramp from the angle. 

“I would have done this months ago if I knew how worked up it would make you,” Harry smirked when Lou finally settled to catch her breath. 

“Maybe I wouldn’t have cared before,” Lou laughed and hid her face against Harry’s neck. “I definitely think this baby is influencing what I find attractive. Not that I didn’t find them attractive before, but you know, the milk and breastfeeding part of it.”

“I’ve started thinking about it a lot, too,” Harry said, “Especially you and then both of us… I know it’s not supposed to be like that, that it’s supposed to be innocent and for the baby and all that, but thinking about it really really turns me on. When I’m doing the pumping thing while you’re at work, sometimes I end up getting off thinking about it.”

She blushed and timidly met Lou’s eyes when she lifted her head. It wasn’t exactly something she expected herself to admit. Not like this, anyway. 

“I’ve thought about it too,” Lou said as she sat back and rubbed her hands over her belly. “I didn’t really think it was something I wanted to do until I started thinking about it like that, about us doing it together.” 

“Yeah?” Harry asked hopefully. 

“Yeah. I think I always thought about it one dimensionally? Just the negative side of it? I’m kind of looking forward to us going through that together.”

“Yeah, me too,” Harry smiled. 

  
  


-

  
  


Ten days had passed since they brought their new baby home and still Harry had yet to produce a drop. She slipped away when Lou and their newborn had fallen asleep and stood under the warm spray of the shower and let it drown out her sobs. Sleep deprivation always did a number on her emotions and she knew that, but she just needed to get it out. 

She leaned back against the tile and cupped her breasts, whimpering because they felt so sore. It wasn’t just her nipples like it had been from the start, it was everything. It reminded her of the tenderness she’d experienced when she first started hormones only on a broader scale now that she’d filled out and had more there to be painful. 

Massaging them was a small relief but came with a different kind of ache that she couldn’t get away from. The warm water seemed to help a little and she continued to squeeze and rub them with her hands while she sniffled.

Once everything had drained out of her and she had no more tears left to shed, she turned off the water that had started to grow cool and stepped out. She dried herself off and twisted her hair up into a towel turban as she stood in front of the mirror. She didn’t want to look at herself and kept the cabinet mirror door open while she brushed her teeth and applied her moisturizer. 

With her big tube of thick lotion, she propped one foot up on the lid of the toilet to start on her leg when some left over water dropped down onto her thigh. She turned to grab the small hand towel to wipe it away and then stopped when she realized it hadn’t fallen from her hair like she would have expected had it been loose. 

She looked down and almost shrieked when she saw a bead of liquid clinging to her nipple. She wiped it away and stared as her nipple continued to slowly weep fluid. 

She feared something was wrong until her thoughts forced things to make sense, that maybe it was finally happening. She squeezed her breast and let out a squeak when enough gathered to create another small drop. 

Still naked, she abandoned the lotion and rushed into their bedroom where Louis was sprawled out over the covers. 

“Lou!! Lou, baby,” Harry jumped onto the bed, bouncing on her knees while the towel came loose from her hair and fell behind her. 

“What the fuck?” Lou groaned and threw an arm over her eyes. “Can you fuck off? How do you even have that much energy?” 

It wasn’t especially mean and Harry did feel bad for waking her when many of their nights since they got home had been rough. 

“Yes, I’ll fuck off in a minute, but  _ Lou _ .” 

Lou groaned again and popped one eye open in a glare. Harry stopped bouncing but the momentum kept her going for another moment until she was left pointing to her nipple with a huge grin on her face. 

“Yeah, you’re naked. I’m really not in the mood.” Lou mumbled and closed her eyes once again. 

“ _ Louuuuu _ ,” Harry gently grabbed her wrist and pulled her arm away from her eyes. “Look!”

Harry’s grin widened when she saw the moment Lou registered the wet trail the drop had left as it rolled down her breast with her movement. 

“Oh thank fuck. Now you can get up in the middle of the night.” 

“I already do!!” Harry whined and pouted, because they had been getting up together so far. 

“I know, I know,” Lou said, her voice rough and tired but affectionate. “I knew it would happen for you, baby. C’mere.” 

Lou pulled her down into a warm hug that made Harry snuggle into her. A small sob of relief took her by surprise when she realized how much she had still been holding in. She’d all but given up and now it was finally happening. 

Lou shushed her gently, kissing her forehead and holding her close. 

“I’m just so happy,” Harry hiccuped and smiled when Lou coaxed her to lift her head. 

“Me too,” Lou said, “Now let’s see.” 

Fully awake now, Lou gently pushed Harry onto her back and ran a hand over her naked body and up to her breast. Lou’s milk hadn’t come in easily either, though it had been easier than Harry’s quest. She used the V of her hand to cup Harry’s breast and then squeezed it forward in a way Harry had seen her use on herself. There wasn’t much, but it was all Harry needed to give her hope. 

“Made for this, just like I thought.” 

Harry let out a watery laugh and let herself believe that it was true now that she knew her body could do it. 

It was agony to wait while she built up to producing more than a few drops and even worse while she waited for her other breast to catch up. She tried to pump on the same schedule as Lou, hoping her body would become attuned to the baby’s cries as Lou’s had.

The first time the baby latched was magical and she cried the whole time while Lou looked on. It was amazing and they took turns once Harry had enough to keep up. 

“You’re beautiful, you know.” 

Harry startled one day as she walked naked from her shower. She turned to see Lou just standing up from the bed and blushed under her appraising gaze. 

There was a full length mirror mounted to their closet door and Lou turned Harry to face it, her hands sliding over Harry’s torso in an embrace. She hooked her chin over Harry’s shoulder after pressing a soft kiss there and then met Harry’s eyes through the glass. 

“You’re just so nice to look at.” 

Harry bit her lip and looked away, but also loved the praise and attention. It was one thing to be comfortable in her own skin, but it was another level to have someone appreciate her the way that Lou always did. 

She looked back at their reflection and admired what they looked like together. They really were a good looking couple. 

“I didn’t think your tits could get any nicer,” Lou grinned as she cupped their weight in her hands. They were full and heavy and more than ready to be pumped dry. It was Harry’s next stop after finding some clothes. 

Lou gave them a nice squeeze and Harry giggled as milk sprayed against the glass. 

“You’re cleaning that up,” she scolded lightly and then caught her bottom lip in her teeth when Lou did it again. 

“You’re so easy to milk,” Lou said softly against her shoulder where she pressed another kiss and the energy of the room shifted so suddenly Harry almost felt dizzy with it. 

She let Lou support her weight as she sagged against her. Lou squeezed and pulled harder this time and Harry was unable to hold back the sound she made as her milk misted the glass and collected in droplets that rolled towards the floor. 

She’d only just showered, but she didn’t pull away, even as her naked body became a canvas for what didn’t make it to the mirror. It felt strange but good for Lou to express her in such a way and she couldn’t tear her eyes away. She wasn’t sure why it was so erotic, but it felt like the most sensual thing she’d ever experienced. 

They shared nothing but heavy breaths as Lou squeezed her breasts and pinched her nipples until they could hardly see their reflection. Her stomach was wet where so much of her milk had dripped and Lou let one hand leave her breast to slide through it. 

She didn’t realize how close to the edge she’d become until Lou’s wet fingers slid down to the place that Harry loved to be fingered. Lou was an expert in finding the canal with her nimble fingers and Harry thought she might pass out just from watching. 

“I could watch you fall apart like this everyday,” Lou mumbled as she circled her fingertip and pushed into the space that opened for her. 

Harry whined and her knees felt weak and unable to support her through the heavy pleasure she gave herself up to. Lou was firm behind her, though, and she felt safe enough to indulge and let her body quiver as she straddled the edge of release. 

When she came, she felt it deep in her core. It punched the breath out of her lungs and stole her vision for a few drawn out seconds where she was sure she was falling. She opened her eyes when it returned to find Lou’s grounding gaze in their reflection and it brought her back to earth. They just stared at each other, chests rising and falling in the wake of what had just happened. 

Their moment was cut short by the familiar cries that broke through the silence. 

“I’ll go,” Lou said as she pressed another kiss to Harry’s shoulder. “I think you need another shower.” 

She wiped her hands off on her shirt and then reluctantly pulled away. She made it all the way to the door before pausing and turning back. 

“Aren’t you glad you put in all the effort for that?” Lou said with a smirk, throwing a wink before leaving Harry breathless in her wake. 

  
  
  



End file.
